Forgive me. I really do apologise for my lack of blogging. I have no idea where time has gone except I tomorrow when I wake, Poppy will be nine weeks old. How????
I am still tired(no surprise) I still have the odd bad day but essentially I am having a ball. Poppy is sleeping sometime for five hours at night. CH is now starting to realise she is the seed from his loins and worth more than just the occasional glance. A mother's love is truly unconditional but it seem a father's love has a few conditions.
1. Baby must not cry when fed, warm and dry
2. Baby must sleep all night with no grunting
3. Baby body fluids must stay contained in unit or within nappy boundry
His tolerence with Pops was wafer thin but now as Poppy will smile, gurgle and laugh at him both his love and tolerence have bloomed. I am much happier.
In my travels I have spoken with several other women in a similar position to myself and it is suprising how we are all going through very similar issues. At one stage I thought I was perhaps married to a monster and how could he not like his daughter, I was disgusted. To discover that I was not alone and in large company in this was somewhat reassuring but frightful at the same time. I have many memories of conversations over my life right from childhood of women saying things along the lines of babies being boring and how men are not really interested until the child is more interactive. I never had a second thought about it. I now know what they really meant, it is automatic for me to think terrible thoughts about these men as imagine how the world would be if most women put their child into the "too hard bin" Some days are hard but we have no choice other than to cope or just to continue. However essentially I have gotten over it and no longer resent CH and take him for what he is in the present not for failures from the past. Is this nature? Is this how we were supposed to be? Is this why this unforgiveable behaviour is easily forgiven?
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