Sunday, November 15, 2009
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Christmas Cake day!
Tomorrow is the day, it may be one whole month late but ladies when tomorrow dawns my home shall be filled with the aroma of Christmas past and building a firm foundation of Christmas Future.Yesterday Ella and I popped on the Christmas Classics, chopped the fruit, ate our full and left the rest swimming in Sherry. I just love going and stirring the mixture, fabulous scent wafts as soon as you lift the gladwrap.
Tonight, I started making the icing decorations and this year this is my interpretation of ye old Christmas tree. I am just gagging to put up our tree. I am almost on the cusp of going back to a real tree as I miss the earthy smell of pine that signals the arrival of Christmas. However I cannot stand the frivolous waste of resources so this year plastic will be my tree of choice.
Monday, November 09, 2009
Christmas is a GO
Right here is the progress on the Stockings, I am about half way through them and in this pic you cannot see the 20hours I have put into beading these arghhhhhhhhhhhh
Thursday, November 05, 2009
On the first day of Christmas, My true love said to me "Drop the credit card love and step away from the Avon catelogue"
Yee haaa, It has finally happened. I am brimming with the Christmas Spirit and surprisingly it is not Bombay Sapphire!
Projects to complete list
Organise Christmas Work do
Help out catering for friends party.
Organise Poppy's Birthday
Handmake three Christmas Stockings, EMMMM far from done.
Make Fabulous Christmas cake for Next week EEEEEEKKKKKK
First Find a new Christmas Cake recipie as I am not happy with current one
Finish Making dolls House ARGHHHHHHHHHHHH
It is finally built with three layers of varnish but now needed to decorate and make curtins
Plan Christmas day Menu on a tight buget
Complete Christmas gift shopping
Decorate the house and beat current record of over 900 lights in the lounge
Shopping trip to Rotorua and Tauranga
Send Christmas cards, I have lost address book, so find addresses.............................yawn
Build time machine to send me back to September.
Projects to complete list
Organise Christmas Work do
Help out catering for friends party.
Organise Poppy's Birthday
Handmake three Christmas Stockings, EMMMM far from done.
Make Fabulous Christmas cake for Next week EEEEEEKKKKKK
First Find a new Christmas Cake recipie as I am not happy with current one
Finish Making dolls House ARGHHHHHHHHHHHH
It is finally built with three layers of varnish but now needed to decorate and make curtins
Plan Christmas day Menu on a tight buget
Complete Christmas gift shopping
Decorate the house and beat current record of over 900 lights in the lounge
Shopping trip to Rotorua and Tauranga
Send Christmas cards, I have lost address book, so find addresses.............................yawn
Build time machine to send me back to September.
Monday, November 02, 2009
We three kings........................yes....tis nearly the season
Normality?
It does not even sound like a real word. Perhaps it is not a real thing. Besides, I am fairly sure it would be a most boring alternative, full of yawns, Jeremy Kyle and Griffins Superwines, dependable biccies those ones!
Crap, I just yawned. Next stop, daytime telly.
Unfortunately, my life is not boring. It is full to bursting. I have got my fingers in so many pies, it is no wonder I am portly. Just when I think I can breathe the sweet smell of 'under control' I go and put my blasted hand up for yet more responsibility. Right at this very moment I should be painting a dolls house or sewing a Christmas Stocking but here I am filling this page with complete garbage. Hey, at least I am not the one reading it.
I should not really be blogging tonight, my mind is elsewhere but theoretically this could be my only chance for awhile and I know some of you will be wondering how we are doing.
We are great. Poppy is amazing, her spots and dots are fading, she is still a little tired but does not let it interfere with her Tanty throwing ability and her hair now seems to be starting to grow in her bald bits. A darker colour, but hair none the less.
Ella-raine is lovely. She has just learned to do a backwards flip on the rings and is so ready for school. I on the other hand am not. Although..........last night at dinner time I was ironing and getting ready for work(so I was already pissed off) and I told Miss Ella to eat her dinner. Well she turned to me with a straight face and said the following,
"Mama, I have two words for you, shut and up!"
Christ I did not see that coming! First shock and then a prompt telling off, I cannot remember if what I said was good as I had to leave the room before I peed myself while laughing.
I did query where on earth she has heard such a thing and she quickly replied Shrek the movie. I must check on that because if that was a lie, then it was a good one and grasshopper may become the master.
Righto, must dash as I have some tree hugging, sandal wearing 'positive visualisation' to do. I jest you not and may the protective white light of all things good guide me tonight, or perhaps it will just be choc, ciggarette and bed.
Friday, September 25, 2009
One three piece pack, extra seasoning and a side of Lorazepam
I still worry. Poppy temperature is still a little higher than normal. Is she OK?
Lorazepam, thats what I need.
To look at her she is just the same, covered in a fading spots but still the same. She has a couple of nasty patches left and one is the shape of a heart on her thigh. I think that speaks volumes.
Her voice is different, softly spoken and very cute. Her laugh has changed, no longer deep and throaty but reminiscent of when a baby laughs with that huge indraw. Yesterday to be honest I was a bit worried about her mental state as on the way home she was just giggling hysterically and do you want to know why? It was her hands, she was just holding them up in the light and cracking herself up. I even asked what was so funny and she said her hands. Simple things I guess. Is she OK?
Yep, I really need some Lorazepam. I may even find how to spell it.
I am still in awe of human spirit. We have notes in our mailbox from people we do not know who just want to help. We have people turning up with meals and still endless calls from people.
I am now faced with a problem. This has been hard but I am not sure what has been harder, a sick child or letting yourself be helped and accepting it willingly. How can I possibly thank them all in a manner that suits the deed? Any token short of life changing feels fraudulent. I could not possibly give enough. I know, I know...............I have been counselled by my nearest and dearest and it appears to be my problem and this is supposed to be some sort of Kharma pay back for me, but I still feel like a bludger. May as well just go into a room and whip myself some more.
I just feel I have so much to do but yet just want it to be over and return to life normality. I am going to try real hard next week and do everything I feel needs to be done then I am going to put this all behind me and perhaps ignore it all for month or two. Ahh blissful ignorance, I miss blissful ignorance. I might practice that for dinner with an upsized three piece from Kentucky.
Lorazepam, thats what I need.
To look at her she is just the same, covered in a fading spots but still the same. She has a couple of nasty patches left and one is the shape of a heart on her thigh. I think that speaks volumes.
Her voice is different, softly spoken and very cute. Her laugh has changed, no longer deep and throaty but reminiscent of when a baby laughs with that huge indraw. Yesterday to be honest I was a bit worried about her mental state as on the way home she was just giggling hysterically and do you want to know why? It was her hands, she was just holding them up in the light and cracking herself up. I even asked what was so funny and she said her hands. Simple things I guess. Is she OK?
Yep, I really need some Lorazepam. I may even find how to spell it.
I am still in awe of human spirit. We have notes in our mailbox from people we do not know who just want to help. We have people turning up with meals and still endless calls from people.
I am now faced with a problem. This has been hard but I am not sure what has been harder, a sick child or letting yourself be helped and accepting it willingly. How can I possibly thank them all in a manner that suits the deed? Any token short of life changing feels fraudulent. I could not possibly give enough. I know, I know...............I have been counselled by my nearest and dearest and it appears to be my problem and this is supposed to be some sort of Kharma pay back for me, but I still feel like a bludger. May as well just go into a room and whip myself some more.
I just feel I have so much to do but yet just want it to be over and return to life normality. I am going to try real hard next week and do everything I feel needs to be done then I am going to put this all behind me and perhaps ignore it all for month or two. Ahh blissful ignorance, I miss blissful ignorance. I might practice that for dinner with an upsized three piece from Kentucky.
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Not so spotty Poppy
Well we made it, finally home with our miracle child.
It was a really wet and dismal day for a homecoming but things were crystal clear.
Angels watch over us and if we are lucky some walk amongst us.
We arrived home to lawns that were mowed, a house that was clean, washing done and a fridge cleaned out, fresh eggs, butter, bread and milk in the fridge and a bunch of flowers on the table. All of these done by different people, different circles but with one small thing in common, Us!
I have been so humbled by not only my close friends but our community and perfect strangers that have taken us in their hearts and done what they can.
I am still processing the enormity of it all and am still a little numb. It is the little things that get you. Like walking into Poppy’s room and remembering the last time I did that when my daughter was fighting for her life and remembering my thoughts on funeral arrangements and complete madness really. I wish I could erase them. I saw the thermometer in the lounge where I left it, my reaction is to rid the house of all things that bring that gut retching time back, but cannot.
This is the third time we have nearly lost our daughter and frankly that is quite enough. However I am such a pagan and have difficulty saying such a thing as if to invite it into my life again. For the record although I have had enough of the life and death thing, I am still prepared to go thorough it countless times if it means we get to have her in our life and I get to kiss her grandchildren. Crap, touch wood. Man that was real hard for me as over the last couple of weeks I have said the term “touch wood” and be buggered if wood is easy to find in a hospital and I was a little OCD about it. Planning to now get a wooden key ring. Feck I am nuts….hey I always have nuts, are they wood?
It was a really wet and dismal day for a homecoming but things were crystal clear.
Angels watch over us and if we are lucky some walk amongst us.
We arrived home to lawns that were mowed, a house that was clean, washing done and a fridge cleaned out, fresh eggs, butter, bread and milk in the fridge and a bunch of flowers on the table. All of these done by different people, different circles but with one small thing in common, Us!
I have been so humbled by not only my close friends but our community and perfect strangers that have taken us in their hearts and done what they can.
I am still processing the enormity of it all and am still a little numb. It is the little things that get you. Like walking into Poppy’s room and remembering the last time I did that when my daughter was fighting for her life and remembering my thoughts on funeral arrangements and complete madness really. I wish I could erase them. I saw the thermometer in the lounge where I left it, my reaction is to rid the house of all things that bring that gut retching time back, but cannot.
This is the third time we have nearly lost our daughter and frankly that is quite enough. However I am such a pagan and have difficulty saying such a thing as if to invite it into my life again. For the record although I have had enough of the life and death thing, I am still prepared to go thorough it countless times if it means we get to have her in our life and I get to kiss her grandchildren. Crap, touch wood. Man that was real hard for me as over the last couple of weeks I have said the term “touch wood” and be buggered if wood is easy to find in a hospital and I was a little OCD about it. Planning to now get a wooden key ring. Feck I am nuts….hey I always have nuts, are they wood?
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